Difficult Words To Say
by Cappuri.Cinoki
Summary: Here's a little preview of Chapter 7, enjoy. Last but not least, did any of you miss me?
1. Chapter 1 I want to kiss you

Chapter 01 – I just want to kiss you

_~ I stared at your lips...so juicy and tempting...I want to kiss them...and taste how sweet it is..._

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_Where is she? She should be here by now…_

His blood has slowly dripped from his head to his face and then to the ground. His white t-shirt now looked as if it was soaked with blood, sweat and dirt. He's staggering as he walked but still forced himself to stand up and wait for her. His vision blurred as the familiar dark spots began to appear. His breath low and weak, almost like a sigh.

_She'll be here...I know…she always did… _

He looked down to his feet and was about to collapse when a hand grip his shoulder. He smiled. She's here now. He slowly looked up and admired her lovely face. He could see she was mad. But most of all he could see that she was trying hard not to cry. He smiled more, that is so like her. She doesn't like to give in to her emotion, but like always he could see through her.

"Hey you! What the hell were you thinking? I thought I've told you to stop making fights with others! Why are you always fighting? Why are you always being so stubborn?" She half-screamed at him and laid a punch on his chest.

He let out a cough and immediately she panicked. She apologized over and over again but he wasn't listening anymore. He would've fallen hard on the ground if it wasn't for her. He lost consciousness.

And his last thought was…_I'm always fighting because that's the only way to get your attention. I'm always stubborn because that is the only thing I can do to make you care_…_because only when I am hurt you are going to be there for me…_

She carried him home that night, like always. He must've been heavy but she is a strong girl. She had carried him all the way by herself. Then she took off his bloody clothes and bathed him with a towel before bandaging his wounds. Then later when she thinks that he is settled, she would stay awake with the lights on but ended up sleeping beside him, like always.

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By then he would woken up and turned to his side to face her. He would stare her all night long, admiring the rise and fall of her chest. But tonight, he had something else in mind. He rise himself up, ignoring the pain all over his body. He slowly slid himself closer to her.

He smiled as he brushed her bangs away from her face. His fingers traced her smooth and beautiful features. She seemed to look more beautiful and lovely than ever as the day pass by. He leaned closer to give himself a better look of her face. Her freckles are faintly visible if he looked at her hard enough. Her lips are always rosy pink and juicy and so tempting to be kiss.

He leaned closer and held his breath. His face centimeters away from hers and he could already feel her breath. His heart beats faster and louder he was so afraid it would wake her. But still he leaned closer.

Now they are face to face now. His eyes aiming at her captivating lips as he slightly opened his own. He refused to close his own eyes for he was afraid if he did, she would immediately open hers.

Their lips are almost touching now. He was just about to close the distance when she…opened her eyes.

He froze and immediately felt ashamed and guilty. Like a boy who was caught red-handed with his hand in a cookie jar.

She on the other hand, stared at him. Shocked for while until it turned into something else, disbelieve and upset. She screamed and instantly pushed him away from her. He fell hard on his back but as if that wasn't enough, she got up to her feet and slapped his face.

The pain immediately stung his heart, instead of his face. He frowned and looked at her again. Being slapped by the very woman he admires was more painful than any beating he gets in a fight. It was then he realized that both of them are panting heavily.

And she was looking down at him with an expression he had never seen before, anger.

"What were you trying to do just now? Are you trying to take advantage of me while I'm asleep?"

He gulped. _I was just trying kiss you_…he had wanted to say that. But that would only make things worse.

"No, I wasn't."

"Liar! You don't think I know that you were trying to kiss me just now?" She pointed a finger directly at him. He stared at it, not wanting to meet her fury gaze. He remained silent and concentrated at her finger.

"You….disgust me." He looked at her, disbelieve. But she had quickly walked out of the room, leaving him alone.

After she went out, he let out a long sigh. "I just wanted to kiss you…"

_ARGH! I can't take this anymore! She has no idea at all of my feelings for her. Doesn't she have clue by now?_

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_~ Some people say 'never kiss a friend because that friend will forever be lost' but what if the only person you are looking for is that friend you've never kissed… ~_

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**A/N**: Athrun and his pent up sexual frustrations. Nuff said. To AxL fans, enjoy. To KxL and AxC fans, get over it.

Disclaimer: Gundam SEED is copyright of Bandai. (I always hated putting this up...)


	2. Chapter 2 I'm sorry

Chapter 02 – I just want to say, I'm sorry

_~ So it seems to me, that sorry seems to be the hardest word…_

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He wanted to have a talk to her. But she's busy working at the moment. So that's the reason why he had been staring at her from afar, for the last 3 hours.

_It is freezing this morning. I must be crazy standing out here in this cold weather…_

He breathes out, forming a cold air as he did. He shrugged his shoulder, feeling slightly cold, thirsty, hungry, his wounds hurts whenever he moves all at the same time. But he ignored all of it and tried his best to get her attention.

She looked so lovely in that blue apron with pink polka dots. He smiled. She had made another apologetic gesture to a customer. He smiled still. Then he thought about it again. Apologizing to a girl isn't supposed to be difficult.

He only had to choose the right words and the right time to say it to her.

She suddenly turned to him, as if noticing him staring all this while. He quickly looked down at his shoes, and realized something. She had given him the shoes as a present. He kicked a can nearby and slowly looked up. She had gone in the restaurant.

He stayed for while, waiting for her to come out again. But she never did. So he decides to go home and wait for her there. He met a friend along the way. They talked for awhile, hanging out at their usual spot. He purposely poked his friend's bandaged forehead, which he tried hiding by wearing a snowcap.

In turn, his friend punched him lightly at his abdomen. Then his friend asked why is he so gloomy. He told his friend, she is mad at someone.

"At you?"

"Who else?"

"About the fight last night?"

"That and among other things."

"Have you apologized to her?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"She's ignoring me. Plus, I'm not sure if I can say it."

"Alright. Let's see how you are going to say it." said his friend. He narrowed his eyes at him; but his friend just shrugged his shoulder. "Just give it a try."

He sighed, "I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. How's that?"

His friend shook his head. "Hmm, you need to be more genuine."

"Okay. How about this? I know I shouldn't have done that. Please forgive me?"

Sighing, he raised an eyebrow as his friend shook his head again. "What am I not doing right this time?"

His friend closed his eyes, obviously thinking. Then he opened his eyes again, "Umm…you also need to be convincing."

Slamming his fist together, he glared at his friend. "I was just gonna kiss you! You got a problem with that?"

His friend smile widely. "Ah! That! That's the one! That's how you do it. I really like it!"

He quickly grabbed his friend's collar and started to shake him hard, "What the hell? I don't give a damn what you like. You are not her! Why the hell did I even ask for your advice?"

"Aarrgghh! I'm sooorrrrryyy!" His friend screamed.

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He waited for her patiently in the dark. He wanted to sit down but he couldn't, he kept on pacing. He felt agitated. She would be home by now. She never came back this late. He felt angry all of a sudden.

_What if something bad had happened to her? What if she got kidnapped? What if…_

The door clicked.

He stopped moving. He stopped breathing. His heart beats faster. He waited.

The moment she walked into the house, he wanted to hug her but immediately stopped. That would make her madder at him. She switched the lights on. She didn't notice him at first. She was busy tiding up her clothes and hair.

Her hair was long down to her waist and so radiant; he wondered how she always managed to make it look stunning. When she finally did notice him, she jumped and held a hand on her chest.

"Don't sneak up on people like that! You scared me!" She screamed at him. "What are you doing still awake at this hour? You are supposed to-"

He gulped. She was screaming again. He needed to make her listen. He needed to let her know. He needed to tell her.

"I'M SORRY!"

"…sleep."

Silence filled the room. They stared at each other. He gave her a pleading expression. He knows he's not good in expressing his emotion, but this is the best he can do. He just hopes it is enough for her to forgive him.

5 minutes had gone, and still she hadn't anything.

"I'm sorry." He said to her again, softly this time. "I really am sorry. I know you're mad about last night. But I just want to tell you, I'm sorry."

She stayed silent. She didn't move. She just stood there and stared hard at him with her eyes. Then she looked down and let out a sigh.

"That's all. I'll go sleep now." He swiftly turned and walked away. But after 5 steps, he heard her calling his name. Stopped in his tracks, he turned back at her.

"Promise me this."

He tilted his head. Confused at her sentence. Promise her what?

"I'll forgive you if you promise me this. Just this."

He inhaled a breath. "Okay."

"Stop fighting. Don't EVER fight again."

He blinked. _That's it? No cleaning the house for a month? No washing plates for a week? No doing your laundries too? No gardening at all?_

He slowly smiled. "Deal." He turned to leave again and went back into his room. That night, he dreamed about her, like always since he met her.

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_~ There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love._

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A/N : Athrun finding it difficult to apologize, since he doesn't know how.

Thanks for all the reviews! I know Lacus is OOC here, but hey, it's not every day we get to see Lacus acting OOC. So I decided to give her a break from her normal self. I mean, other Gundam SEED characters can get OOC and suddenly Lacus aren't allowed to be OOC? Hmm…


	3. Chapter 3 I would

Chapter 03 – I would love to…

_~ "The secret of happiness is to admire without desiring."_

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The next morning comes.

Both of them are having breakfast in the kitchen. He loves having breakfast with her. He loves every breakfast she made. He loves having morning conversations with her.

But most of all he loves looking at her…in her just-woke-up attire. Messy hair, no make-up put on, still wearing her pajamas…which is an oversized t-shirt that goes just above her knee.

_I wonder if she's wearing any bra…or underwear…_

"Hey! Are you listening?" She's pouting, and he loves whenever she did that too.

"Huh? What?"

She crossed her arms. "Do you want to go with me to my college reunion? It's next week."

"Eh? College reunion?" He stared at her dumbfounded.

He took another spoonful of cereal as she repeated herself. He was about to swallow, but something got stuck. He coughs out loud. She quickly rushes to his side and patted his back. His coughing gradually stopped.

"Chew properly before you swallow. You're not a small boy. Seriously, I feel like I am your mother sometimes."

She handed him orange juice. He gladly accepts and drank it. He felt a little better, but purposely cough again so that she would continue and pat his back. He smiled when she began caressing his back instead of patting. He frowned when she pulled her hand away.

"So, are you coming or not?" He heard her asking again. If he's not mistaken, she sounded like she was pleading for him to come along.

He's being mischievous. He raised an eyebrow at her. "Remind me why I to go with you again? To YOUR college reunion?"

She gaped at him and rolled her eyes, then look back at him, "Because I hate the idea of leaving you all alone in this house by yourself. Plus…who knows what you're going to do having the house all for yourself."

"Right…don't forget, I'm paying the rent too. So I think I have the right to do what I want."

She narrowed her eyes and said in a stern tone, "What did you say?"

He looked up at her. "I said I'm not going to your stupid reunion thing."

At this moment, he realized she's looking at him with disbelieve eyes. "Yes, you are. You are GOING to my stupid reunion thing."

He grinned and leaned closer to her face. "Well, that's just too bad. I'm not GOING."

"Yes you are!" She leaned too.

"Well, you can't make me go!" He leaned closer again.

"Oh yes I CAN!"

Both their eyes widen. Suddenly they realize that their faces are way too close with each other…again. He didn't lean back. He loves staring at her up-close.

Immediately she leaned back, "Fine. I'll just go ask Dearka then to go with me."

She turned towards the door, waving her hand without looking back, "I'm off to work."

_Pfff….ask Dearka to go with you….WAIT! DEARKA! What? Why him? What? I don't believe this! _

He quickly stood up and looked back at her. She was already exiting the door. He opened his mouth…

_WAIT! I was just kidding! I didn't really mean that! I would love to go with you…to your stupid reunion thing._

…but those words never come out. She has left the house. He slumped back onto his chair.

_Stupid…you should've said yes._

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He pretended to be busy playing his PS3 when she came back from work that day. He pretended to ignore her as she sat at opposite end of the couch. He pretended to act like she wasn't even there with him.

He had wanted to ask her. He wanted to know, if Dearka have accepted her invitation.

But instead of asking, he continued to busy himself with his PS3. He didn't want think about it. He wanted to let it just go. He didn't want to care. Soon, he sort of lost his concentration at the game he's playing, he lose. He gritted his teeth as to prevent himself from asking.

Then he heard her…giggled.

He thought he had heard the most beautiful sound as he listen to her giggles. Like a perfect music in his ears. He looked at her. He loves it everytime she smiles or giggled. He tilted his head and can't help thinking.

_Did Dearka actually agreed to go with her? Is this the reason she is happy? _

"How could you lose in such an easy game?" She giggled again, this time looking at him.

His reply? Is a puzzled look at her as she took the controller away from his hand, and continued the game. She gave him a challenging look. He waved his hand as to tell her to proceed, to show him if she could actually beat the game.

All the while she's playing; he pretended to pay his attention to the screen. But he stole glances at her, occasionally turning his head at her.

Until at point, he never took off his eyes of her…even when she cheered loudly as she won. He didn't have to look at the screen. He knew she'd won. She had beaten the game. She giggled more, raising her hands up in the air.

Then she tossed the controller beside her and leaned her head back, her eyes close. He followed her, but he didn't close his eyes.

"Congratulations. You beat the game."

She smiled, and he didn't have to look. He knows it.

"Thank you."

_Did you ask Dearka? What did he say? Did he say yes? Is he going with you to the reunion?_

The questions keep repeating in his head. He licked his lips, running his finger through his messy navy hair. Then he too started to close his eyes. Tired of the questions he was afraid to ask.

After a moment, she had leaned moved closer to him. It must have felt forever as he tried not to move and resisting the urge to open his eyes. He took long deep breaths to calm himself.

"Would you like to go with me to my college reunion?" she whispered in his ear.

This time it's his turn to smile. Her voice sound so sexy when she whispered, another thing he love about her. But he still doesn't want to open his eyes. "I thought you were going with that Dearka guy."

"Well…he…said he'll think about it. Do you really don't want to go?" she whispered again.

"Do you really want me to?" Surprisingly, he was whispering too.

"Yes. I feel much more comfortable around you."

He smiled wider at her words. "Well, since you really want me to…" he opened his eyes and turned to her.

She was resting her chin on her arms that were placed on her knees, waiting patiently for his answer. Her crystal blue eyes full of anticipation and curiosity.

"…I will go with you. Besides, it's not fun being here all by myself."

Instantly, she beamed with the widest and sweetest smile he had ever seen from her. "Thank you so much. I know I can always count on you."

Unexpectedly as soon as she finished whispering, she quickly raised her and bends her head…kissed him lightly on the lips. It's more like the brushing of lips instead of a peck or kiss…but it is more than enough to raise the tension that was building in him.

And all he can do is just…smiled back at her the widest and sweetest smile he never thought he ever could.

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_~ For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul._

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**A/N**: Athrun didn't actually want to go because he wanted Lacus to stay with him. But at last he gave in and agreed to go, anything for Lacus. Besides, he gets lonely without Lacus around bossing him around.


	4. Chapter 4 I knew it

Chapter 04 – I know, I know it…I just know it

_~ One of the hardest things in life is watching the person you love, love someone else._

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_Who is this gizmo? _

He narrowed his eyes at _him_. The guy had appeared out of nowhere.

_Another college friend of hers? Looks like it. But why does she look at him differently than the others?_

His eyes slowly shifted to her face. Earlier she had been smiling, talking and giggling with him. She looked like she enjoyed his company. Well almost, because he could feel the tension radiating from her…as if she was expecting something bad to happen.

But right now, her smile has faded, her giggles had stopped. All conversations died away. She unconsciously stood up from her seat. The moment this particular guy appeared in front of her.

Her two friends went silent too as they shifted a little in their seats, clearly uncomfortable in the current situation. _What's going on?_ He observed the guy again. _He_ had brown hair that was slightly messy and was wearing a business suit. _Pff…what a showoff._

"Lacus." The guy spoke to her.

"Ki…Kira." She was blushing, he saw.

_Are you blushing? Why are you blushing? Why are you blushing at him? Why is he making you blush?_

"Good to see you again." The guy politely extended his hand.

He looked at _his_ hand. There was a tense pause, but then she slowly extended hers. "Good to see you, too."

They clasped hands. 10 seconds gone, they still won't let go of each other's hands. Their eyes stared intensely into each other. He couldn't stand it and looked away. He noticed the guy suddenly tightened _his_ grip on hers.

He immediately felt like he wanted to grab her hand away from the guy. He felt relieved when she quickly withdrew her hand.

"I … I didn't knew you were coming." She smiled at _him_, but he could recognize the effort behind it. He couldn't help noticing her posture suddenly stiffen and the slight elevation of her chin. He watched her looked behind _him_, as if to find someone. "Where's Cagalli?"

_Who's Cagalli?_

"HereI am!" A petite, vivacious girl stepped in between them and hooked _her_ arms around her shoulders. The girl had blonde hair and her voice was low and a bit gruff. "Oh Lacus! I'm so glad you came to this reunion! We missed you sooo much!" she said fervently. "Especially my brother here. Right, Kira?" She kissed her brother's cheek with a loud smack, and then did the same to her. "Wow Lacus…you haven't changed one bit. Or should I say, you are as beautiful as ever."

He didn't look at her. He didn't want to see if she was blushing again. His eyes fixed on the other guy. Sensing someone was looking at _him_, _he_ turned _his_ head.

Emerald eyes met amethyst eyes. Both of them glare at each other.

"Who's this?" _he_ asked her, gesturing to him. "Boyfriend of yours?"

"Boyfriend? You have a boyfriend now Lacus?" The blonde girl threw a glance at him; he could clearly sense the disappointment in _her_ tone.

_What's with that tone blondie? And who the hell is this gizmo? _He gave the guy another glare and gave her a questioning look.

She threw him one nervous glance, trying to avoid his quizzical eyes. "My…" she paused for a second, "…date. He's…my date."

_She hesitated. Why? What's with the hesitation?_

"Date?" the guy mocked her. "You brought a date to our reunion? What do you think this is? A prom?"

Her other two friends gave him the 'it's none of our business' look. Obviously, they didn't want to get involved in the awkward conversation. He took a deep breath and stood up.

"I believe I haven't introduced myself, I'm Alex, Alex Dino. Nice to meet you." But he didn't extend his hand. He was afraid he might punch the guy right there then. But he knew he won't, he had promised her. He wouldn't betray that promise. Their promise.

"Alex Dino eh? I'm Kira Yamato. So, how do you like the reunion party so far?" _His_ eyes shifted from him to her, then to him again.

He grinned. He knew the hidden meaning behind _his_ words. _Who the hell are you and what the hell are you doing here?_

No one spoke and just watched as they glared at other. Not even her.

Then suddenly, the blonde girl blurted out loud, "Hey, I just remembered! I have been working on this project for a year now and now it's finally finished! And I want to show it to you guys!"

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He searched for her. He must find her. He needed to find her.

He had seen her dash out of the room a moment ago. He blamed himself. He should've gone in that room with her. If he did, she wouldn't be…he could have…she would have been just fine. But he didn't, even when she has insisted him to. He had told her, he has nothing to do with whatever the project the blondie had been working on. He knew his place; he knew his place in her friend's eyes. He had no business being here, no business to even try and make conversation with any of her friends. He was not even in the same college with them all.

So basically, he was an outsider. An outcast. An unknown. A nothing. Nothing to them all.

_Perhaps I also am nothing to…her. I don't want to be that to you, just nothing. I'd hate it if that was the case. _

Memories of his own teenage years start to emerge in his mind. _Not now, please don't come out now._ He violently shook his head; he didn't want to remember all those memories now. All those appalling memories. Right now, he must find her.

She had been upset when she left the room. He searched every part of the house for her. But still she is nowhere to be found. People are giving him the 'what the hell are you doing?' look as he kept entering each and every room in the huge house.

_Did she leave? If she did, she must have looked for me. Or send for someone to tell me that she's left…left me all by myself in a house full of people I had never known in my whole life. You wouldn't do that, right? Would you?_

At last, when he had come to the conclusion that…she had left him after all, he saw a figure outside at the back of the house through the glass door. He sighed out loud. He smiled in relief. She hadn't left…

_So there you are…what are you doing outside all by yourself?_

He was about to open the door to go outside to her, when he spotted another figure not far from her. Then he realized. She wasn't outside alone. Someone else was with her. The brown-haired guy, _his_ back was facing him. He focused on her again. The expression on her face was one he knew too well. She was arguing with the guy.

_What's the matter? Why are you arguing? What are you arguing about?_

He forced himself to wait and watch what was happening…watch what is going to happen. Then her expression changes from upset to anguish. She was becoming distressed.

Distressed about what? He didn't care. All he cares is about her. All he cares is about taking her anguish away. All he cares about is…that she is…okay again.

But she seems to continue arguing. And the arguing doesn't seem to stop.

He looked away, couldn't take it anymore and started to grab the doorknob. He looked at her again. He stopped turning the doorknob, letting his hand fall down. This time he couldn't look away.

The scene in front of him was too unbearable for him, but still he refused to look away. He couldn't believe what was happening in front of his eyes. His heart lurched, as if someone had ripped it off from his chest and squeezed it hard. Squeezed the blood out of his heart till it's dry.

He hated that feeling. And he hated the very scene playing right now before his eyes.

They are kissing.

She is kissing him. That guy. Willingly.

What's worse…she seemed to prolong the kiss.

And that made him wanted to hate her too. But he couldn't. He hated the fact that he couldn't hate her at all.

Angered, heartbroken and feeling very helpless, he smashed the glass door hard, then quickly turned and left the house through the other exit. He walked and walked and then ran, ran as fast and as far as his legs could take him. He doesn't care where he'll end up. He just knows he had to get out of the house and as far as possible from her.

He kept running and running till he tripped over a can and fell hard to the concrete ground. This time, she was not there to catch him, not there to stop his fall, not there for him.

He remained lying on the floor and rolled onto his back. Rubbing his face with his hand, he smelt something familiar. There was blood on his hand. A LOT of blood. He silently wished it was the brown-haired guy's blood on his hands right now.

His vision blurred. _Am I crying? What the hell am I crying for? It's just a kiss._

He knew better. It wasn't just a kiss. It was a passionate kiss, the kind of kiss between lovers.

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_Should I smile cause were friends, or should I cry cause that's all we will ever gonna be__**.**_

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_**A/N - Thanks for all the reviews so far! I really appreciate it. **And I would also like to thank my beta-reader for beta-reading this._

Now some of you might be wondering why Athrun said his name was Alex Dino, well that will be explain in later chapters. Some things is not always what they seem to be.

Lacus just wanted to bring Athrun to the reunion to get back at the guy, but too bad it backfires back at her.


	5. Chapter 5 I am in pain

Chapter 5 – I'm In Pain

_~ Tears are words the heart can't express._

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_Why am I…..here? Why did I…..come back?_

_Why can't I…..just runaway? Why do I need…..to see her again?_

_But she kissed…..that guy…_

He looked up and sighed. It's broad daylight. She's usually working right now. So that means it's safe for him to enter the house. He didn't want to see her…so soon. Huh, what was he thinking? He hadn't seen her for three days. Three days should be enough for him to recover…right? Or is it?

He sighed again. He desperately needs a shower and a lot of rest. He checked his injured hand, maybe he needs a doctor too. It's swollen but at least the bleeding had stopped. If only his heart could stop bleeding too…

After a nice fresh shower, bandaging his hand and having a proper meal, he took his first sleep in three days. _It sure is nice….to be back…._

Few long hours later, he woke up. And he heard the door clicked outside from inside his room.

She's back.

He could feel her strong presence even from his room. He sat up, and walked up to the door. His hand grip the door handle, but he hesitated. His grip tightened a little too hard. He leaned onto the door and listen quietly.

Her faint footsteps were enough to make him nervous. He closed his eyes and swallowed. _What is it you are so afraid of? C'mon, get a grip on yourself. You're used to her scolding you right? Why is it this time any different?_

He listen again, the sound of her footsteps have stopped. The only thing he could hear now was his own shallow breath and rapid heartbeat. Slowly he let go of his grip off the door handle and slowly back away from the door. It is different this time because…if he looked at her, his mind would immediately go back to that incident. Seeing her kissing another guy, made his old wounds open up and bleed again.

Suddenly he finds himself reminiscing the past. The last time he got heartbroken, someone else was having the happiest moment of their lives. Come to think of it, his whole life hadn't been a decent one either.

_I don't know my mother, my own father is dead, and the only person who cared about me left me for someone else. Hah, it seems my agony is always other's happiness. I always end up alone. I'm a…_

"Alex?" a gentle voiced called his name. _Oh how I missed that sweet soothing voice of yours…_

His head slowly looked up and saw her beautiful face looking at him in concerned. He got lost in his own thoughts. He didn't notice that she had entered his room. She was still in her working uniform, and he noticed the faint redness in her eyes. Had she been crying? Or did she have trouble sleeping the past few days? Or maybe she's just mad at him for…whatever that's making her mad at him?

He gulped and waited. He realized he was holding his breath. His heart aches so much. His hand rested on his chest and clutched his shirt very tightly. She tentatively walked towards him and his body hunch immediately. The aching he felt in his heart intensified dramatically.

"Alex? Are you okay?" she immediately went to him, placing her hands on his shoulder. "What's wrong?"

_No, I'm not okay. I don't know what's wrong with me, Lacus. I always end up alone. I am always the only who ends up in pain. I am in pain. I'm in so much pain right now. _

He gritted his teeth and blinked. His lips trembled as he struggles not to cry. His eyes soften when she tenderly cupped his eyes fixed on her as he reached out and pulled her into a tight embrace.

_Help me….Lacus, please. I need you so much. I don't know what to do anymore. Please don't leave me. _His hold around her tightens but she just stood there, not returning his embrace. He closed his eyes.

And then…he weeps, knowing he will hate himself for that.

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Although deep in sleep within a dream, he felt someone stroking his hair. A gentle, soft touch, and cool hand upon him. He felt himself smile, enjoying the simple touch. His emerald eyes fluttered open. It took him a few seconds to realize the position he was in.

He had been lying facedown on her lap. He focused and realized that they were on his bed. Somehow he had been crying himself to sleep and end up using her lap as a pillow. Breathing in deeply as he slowly lifted his head and stood his body up.

She moaned. He froze; his eyes widen in embarrassment. His head had unexpectedly ended up between her breasts. Immediately he jerked backwards violently. And end up falling down on the floor with a loud thud. He cursed when his head hits something hard.

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He stared hard at his injured hand as she was finishing the bandaging. The silence between them is killing him. He was really uncomfortable with it but refused to say anything, afraid he would make things worse by opening his mouth. When she was done, he muttered his thanks to her and quickly stood up from the couch but was pulled back down instantly.

"I'm not done yet. I still need to treat that cut on your forehead." _When you're at it can you treat my heart as well? It's been in pain for so long._

He protested but she was already leaning closer. He tried to look elsewhere but all he can see is her face, so close to his. It's…kind of strange and refreshing. She used to babble or lectured him as she was treating his wounds. But right now, she was silently and gently treating him. Not like those times when she would purposely inflict pain to his wounds just to teach him a lesson.

_I guess if I wasn't too busy beating up people, I would have noticed how gentle you actually are. Haha, I guess I really did manage to get on your nerves to get you mad, eh? _He silently grinned at this thought.

His eyes kept gazing at her face.

_Your eyes, they are somewhat between the color blue and purple, or maybe I hurt my head so bad I'm going colorblind. Your lips, they are so smooth and luscious. I wonder how it would feel to kiss it, taste it even._

His other hand lightly caressed her cheeks. She stopped and began to lean back a little, a frown forming on her face. "Alex?"

"Don't move." He gulped. He knew he's crossing the boundaries between them. The very boundaries she had set for them from the very first day they had decide to share the house together.

Her eyes narrowed and she tried to pry his hand away from her face, but instead he grabbed her hand and gently placed it on the side of his face. His heart began to ache again. He was relieved when she didn't move as he asked her to but what he didn't expect to see the fear in her eyes as he slowly leaned towards her. Suddenly the idea of kissing her seemed to be a very bad idea at the moment.

_I should stop now, before I end up doing…what I wanted to do._

He paused in his moves. He blinked and realized how close their lips are with each other. Both can feel their breath on each other's face. He knew he should back away now but unable to do so. Too mesmerize and intoxicated by both her powerful presence and her lovely scent.

He slowly blinked again but didn't open his eyes later. Somehow their lips have a mind of their own and close the gap between them. _That's strange, I'm very sure that I didn't move closer. Maybe she…_

All thoughts fade away as he felt her deepen the kiss and he pulled her closer.

_I will hate myself for this. I just hope she won't hate me for this._

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_~ Inhaling your breath into my body, taking you into my soul, all this, through a kiss._

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A/N : Athrun finally breaks down, luckily Lacus is there for him…even when she didn't hug him back. Athrun gave in to his desire, unable to resist anymore. It's now or never….but the question is..who was kissing who in the first place?


	6. Chapter 6 I'll do anything

Chapter 06 – I'll do anything you ask me to

_I'll do anything for you, whatever you want me to. You know I will do._

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It was their TV night, in which they both would stay up late and watch whatever that's on the TV.

He shouldn't have said yes to her that day. But somehow she is quite the manipulator. _That damn schedule._

He couldn't take it anymore and turned to her, "Could you change the channel?"

She stopped chewing her popcorn and turned to him, "You forgot to say please." She said in a sing song tune.

He rolled his eyes at her, "Please?" He tried mimicking her voice to mock her.

She giggled, "Oh, a nice one. That's the closest one you got so far."

"Right, now change the channel?"

She raised an eyebrow at him.

He grumbled, "Please?"

She just stared at him, eyebrow raised and popped a popcorn into her mouth. Then she turned her attention back to the TV, "No."

"Why not?" He protested.

Without turning to him she replied, "Because I don't feel like watching 22 men running around a field chasing a ball. Besides, it's my turn tonight. Remember the schedule you and I had agreed on?"

_I knew she's gonna bring that up eventually. Why the heck did I did say yes to whatever she asked me to? Great, we're not even in a relationship and I'm whipped._

He sighed and took another swig from his soda can. He remained silent and tried to enjoy the rest of the TV night. His jaw felt a little numb and he unconsciously rubbed it.

"Does it still hurt?"

He thought it was the TV at first, but then realized it was the commercials. So he slowly shifted his eyes at her, and was taken by the sight of her.

She was staring at him with a cute pout and a rather sensual pose. _How does she even make a simple pose so…so hot? And why do I always find her so irresistible? _

He swallowed hard. "What?"

"Your jaw. Does it still hurt?" she whispered, her tone concerned.

"Not so much as this morning." He licked his lips.

Her lips slightly parted as she continues to stare at him in silence.

"Nice punch by the way. Knock me out completely. Can't decide whether I should be impressed or embarrassed getting KO by a girl." He laughed a little.

Few seconds later, she broke out into laughter. Her head thrown backwards as her laughter continues. "Yeah, you kinda deserve it anyway." She struggled to say through her laughter.

"Yeah, yeah. Laugh all you want. I'm getting another soda." Slowly he got up from the couch and into the kitchen. He grabbed another soda from the fridge and was about to walk back to the living room, when a thought occurred to him.

He slowly turned back into the kitchen.

_.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-._

"Here. For you." He handed her a pink mug.

"What's this?"

"Your favourite drink."

"Coffee? Wow, thanks." He watched intently as she sipped her drink and purr in satisfaction.

"You make the greatest coffee ever, Alex." He sat down on the couch as she took another sip. _No Lacus, I just make coffee the way you want them._

"You are not afraid if I put poison in it?" He grinned at her.

She stuck out her tongue at him, "Then it shall be my last really good cup of coffee and I'm satisfied at that."

"You are that easy to be please?"

"Occasionally, if it's done by the right person. Thanks again, Alex."

"Uh-huh. It's the least I could do after –" He didn't dare to finish his words. He didn't dare to look at her.

She on the other hand, didn't say anything at all. Instead, took another sip from her mug.

For the next half an hour, he sat watching the TV while sipping his soda several times. She was also doing the same, though he noticed her attention was fixed more onto the coffee more than the TV. The show had finished and the credits roll, but still he remained as he were. He merely enjoyed the moment with her.

"Alex?"

"Yeah?" When she didn't answer, he shifted his vision to her. She looks like she wants about to tell him her secret but is hesitant to do so.

"I'm…," She took a deep breath as she met his gaze equally; "I'm leaving."

He almost choked his soda. "You're what?"

"I'm leaving. It's –"

"You're…leaving? Why? Is it because I cross the boundary line? Is it because…" he struggled to say the next words, "-I kissed you last night?"

She let out a small gasped, and stared intensely at him.

He stared back at her. Trying to get her tell him the real reason she's leaving. "Just because of one kiss and that's it? You're leaving me?"

He didn't realize he was pinning her against the couch suddenly. He felt her stiffen, as if struggling not to flinch. He quickly let go of her when he was aware of what he did. "I – Sorry, didn't mean to…I didn't hurt you, didn't I?"

"It's ok. I'm fine, you just...surprised me. That's all." She rubbed the spot where his hands were gripping her a while ago. "And no, it has nothing to do about what happened last night."

"Yeah, well…sorry. I'm going to bed." He quickly got up and walked toward his bedroom.

If she is leaving him, then he won't stop her. He just didn't want to deal with it now. He didn't want to have to deal with this ever. _Fine, just leave! Everybody does, so you are like the rest of them! _

He could hear her footsteps behind him, as if she was following him. He felt a hard tug at his shoulder and found her standing in front of him, slightly panting.

"I don't want hear it. You want to leave? Then just –" his sentence was cut short.

She grabbed his t-shirt and shake him as she say each words, "Will you just stop acting like a child for once and listen to me! I'm not finished yet. I'm leaving but it's JUST FOR A WEEK!"

He blinked at her.

His eyes widen after his mind finish processing what she just said.

_I am such an asshole_.

He wants to smack himself in the head hard and buried himself someplace that no one will ever find him.

"I'm leaving but I'm coming back after a week. Now, I just want you to do a favour for me. Please take care of yourself when I'm away. And please, please take good care of the house. I don't want to come back and find fire-fighters around the house again. Can you do this for me?"

He gave her a timid nod. _I'll do anything you ask me too._

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He was standing still in the living room. He looked around and sighed.

He decided to go to the kitchen. He pouted and sat down.

It's too quiet.

Something isn't right this morning. Something is missing.

Or to put it more accurately, someone is missing.

He sighed again as he stood up. He opened the freezer and started to make himself breakfast, which he failed to do miserably. He was mad at himself, and also her.

"At least make me breakfast before you leave!" he slammed his fist on the kitchen counter.

For the first time in three years, she was going to be away for not one, or two, or three days but for a week!

_Why did she have to leave anyway? What is so important that she is away for the whole week?_

One whole damn week! She was still here last night. But it seems that she had left very early this morning.

What is there to do in one week, without her? All alone by himself. He was feeling kind of hopeless whenever and wherever she was not around. He couldn't even make breakfast on his own. How could he possibly survive one week without her? She always makes breakfast for both of them, even when he doesn't ask her to. It's one of the reasons he purposely woke up late in the mornings. He always loves her cooking.

Sometimes he felt like he was taking advantage of her hospitality.

But he can't help it. She is such an excellent cook.

He looked around again and something caught his attention. A pair of mugs. One is blue, the other is pink. The pink one is obviously hers. He reached out and held both mugs in his hands. There were a couple of post-it-notes attached to her pink mug and one on his blue mug.

He read the ones on her mug first.

- There's omelette in the pan. Don't skip breakfast. –

- I don't want you destroying the kitchen so I've asked Dearka to deliver your breakfast and dinner until my return. –

- I don't want you starving yourself so if you're still hungry, there are some cup noodles in the one of the kitchen cabinets. P.S_: I'll let this slide just this once. When I'm back, no more cup noodles for you_. –

- I'll be back next week. Take care. Love, Lacus. -

She has a very nice handwriting and signature. He traced the word love and swallowed hard. He felt happy but soon it was replaced by dismay.

He brushed his feelings away and focused on the single post-it on his mug.

- I know you can make great coffee. So what are you waiting for? -

He snickered. Right, I can survive this one week.

…..Uh-huh.

_Yeah, right. Who am I kidding? I miss her goddamn much already. And it's just been several hours since she left._

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_Absence makes the heart grow fonder. _

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A/N: Thank you for the encouraging reviews. It keeps the will in me to continue this story. Special thanks to IgNighted for reviewing every chapter. Your reviews brought this story back to life. Kudos!

I apologize for the long delay. Enjoy.


	7. Companion Piece Pt 01

_(Companion piece for Chapter 1.) _

_He must be there. He is always there …_

She ran with all her might but felt she didn't run fast enough. Her leg muscles were already aching and starting to get tired from all the running, but she willed herself to go on. Her energy is slowly diminishing and she was panting in and out. She stopped running and her eyes darting wildly around her surroundings trying to find him. Finally, her eyes caught the figure of a man leaning onto a wall in a peculiar manner. Her eyes went wide and she instantly ran towards the man.

_Hang on there…I'm almost there…just hang on…_

She reaches him and quickly cupped his bloodied face. His injuries were not as serious as the last time, and she breathes a sigh of relief. He was hurt very badly but he's still alive. Blood was all over him especially his clothes and his hair. Tears started to swell up in her eyes but she quickly blinked it away. She needed to look like she was mad. She glared at him with both her eyes. But he was smiling at her. _Jerk! You're barely alive and you still manage to smile!_

She opened her mouth and shouted at him. "Hey you! What the hell were you thinking? I thought I've told you to stop making fights with others! Why are you always fighting? Why are you always being so stubborn?"

She punched his chest out of reflex. He coughs. Panicked, she apologized again and again but was alarmed when she saw him collapsing. She catches his body just in time before he hits the ground. He had fainted.

Finally she let her tears roll down her cheeks and whispered to him, knowing he won't hear…_Why are you always hurting yourself like this? Why won't you listen to me? Don't you know it makes me cry seeing you like this every time?_

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That night she piggybacked him home again. She's exhausted and the added weight on her almost made her fall over. But surprisingly she managed to carry him all the way. As if she suddenly has this unbeknownst strength in her. When they reached home, she put him gently on his bed; undress his torn and dirty clothes, leaving him only in his short pants.

She wiped all the blood from his body, face and hair then tended to his wounds. She clenched her teeth when she saw that his previous wounds haven't healed completely. He seemed to get more wounds rather than heal from it. She's done bandaging now so she stayed awake and gazed at his bandage body.

Lately he began to pick fights more often, completely ignoring her request for him to stop his bad habit. When she saw his friend running towards her at her workplace, she noticed bloody bruises all over him and she knew he was at it again. He was at it again, despite all her pleas not to do so. Her boss will be mad at her tomorrow when he finds out she skipped her work shift again.

Her eyes started to get sleepy. She wanted to stay awake. She wants to be there when he woke up. But like always, she ended up sleeping beside him.

Later, she knew he had moved closer to her. She somehow has this special sense to know if someone's near her even when she sleeps. She could hear every move he made. Like always, she decided to keep her eyes shut. She secretly loves it when he stared at her for hours. Her eyes are closed, but she knew he was staring. She can feel it under her skin.

But tonight, his routine seemed to have change. He had moved closer than he usually does. He even gently caressed her face. She fought hard the urge to lean into his touch. The way his fingers softly trailed on her face sent jolts of electricity all over her entire body. It's the first time he had touched her. She calmly waited for his next move.

He is moving closer to her now, closer to her than he normally would. Too close even. She could feel his body heat radiating to her. She prevented herself from smiling, as if knowing what he was up to. Curious to see if her suspicions are true, she opened her eyes. Her eyes widen when she realize their faces are millimeters away.

He didn't move. Their eyes are directly in front of each other. She was too shocked or maybe too excited. She screamed. Then she quickly pushed hard against him. Feeling embarrassed and upset, she kept her eyes on him as she got up to her feet. Before she knew it, her hand spontaneously slapped him across his bandaged face. She winced a little. That had got to hurt a LOT. She blamed her quick reflex.

_Why oh why did I slap him?_ She was panting. Her heartbeat is racing. _Silly me, what was that slap for? You KNEW he was going to kiss you. You had expected it. Wanting…craving…begging it silently._ It's been awhile since someone had kissed _her. Damned needs._ She could clearly see him frowning at her, so she put up an angered expression. Not at him, but at her own stupidity.

_Say something, quick!_

"What were you trying to do just now? Are you trying to take advantage of me while I'm asleep?"

_Stupid! That's the best you can come up with? _

"No, I wasn't." That was his answer to her. _Then why were you leaning so close like that?_

"Liar! You don't think I know that you were trying to kiss me just now?" Her index finger is pointing at him. He didn't look at her; but at her pointing finger.

She suddenly felt guilty for her harsh reaction. What _have you just done? Slapping him like that, for what? For trying to kiss you? Don't forget, you secretly wanted it._ _You should be ashamed of yourself_. "You….disgust me." She was referring to herself.

_Did I just say that loud?_ Oh dear, she wasn't supposed to say it out loud. Now she really felt disgusted with herself. She had to get out of here. She needed to get away from him. She turned to leave. Once she was out his room, she leaned near the doorway, trying to calm herself.

"I just wanted to kiss you…"

She froze. _Did he just said that?_ She replayed the words over and over in her head. She had hoped he did. Her fingers unconsciously touched her lips. The corners of her mouth curved into a small smile.

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_~ Kiss me out of the bearded barley, kiss me beneath the milky twilight, kiss me down by the broken tree house…so kiss me… - Guess who sang this lyric?_

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_(Companion piece for Chapter 2.) _

She busied herself, taking orders here and there. She wanted to avoid any possible conversation he wanted with her. She noticed him standing there for the last few hours.

_He must be freezing…silly fool…you haven't completely healed yet…_

She took another customer's order, planting a lovely but forced smile on her face. She pretended to listen and nodded as the customer gave her his order.

_This customer is so fussy….maybe you should prepare all that orders yourself…_

When the customer finished his sentence, she gave him a nod and passed his order to another co-worker. She felt a little sleepy and ran into a customer who was standing in her way. The customer looked at her, upset. She quickly apologized.

_This has to stop NOW…go home you idiot…I can't work properly with you staring at me all times…_

She turned fiercely at him. She noticed he was staring at his shoes. Then she quickly went into the restaurant. She let out a breath, relieved that she is out of his vision. All those staring are making her uncomfortable…and strangely turn on.

"He's still out there, is it?"

"She jumped and looked at her side. It's her friend who is also her co-worker. They both had been friends since the first day they work together in the restaurant.

"Y…yes. He's been there for hours."

"Poor guy. He must be freezing."

"He should've stayed at home."

Silence filled the air.

"He's fighting again?"

She simply nodded at her friend.

"Last night too?"

She nodded again.

"Looks like he really wanted to see you." Her friend said, and peered through the restaurant's large glass window.

She remained quiet. There's no use denying at her friend's statement.

She knew he had wanted to see her. She could clearly see that. He confirmed that by waiting for her out there in the cold.

"Ah, he's leaving!" her friend said out loud.

_Finally…it's about time…_

She followed her friend's glance. Her friend was correct. He was leaving. But she knew she can't avoid him forever, since they both are staying in the same house. She sighed…

_At least I can still avoid him tonight…_

She quickly turned to her friend. "So, I'm on extra shift tonight right?"

Her friend grinned at her. "Planning on working extra late tonight, hoping that by the time you came back from work, he would already fall asleep. Thus, you can once again avoid talking to him."

She smiled wearily at her friend and sigh, "You read my mind."

"Hah! I knew it! I knew it! I knew it!" Her friend raised a finger and sways her body left and right, giggling all the time.

"There! Am done for tonight!" She brushed her hands together. Then she raised her hands up in the air, as if she won another mission.

Her friend simple yawned. "Yeah. Me too. I'm heading home now."

"Alright then. I'm heading home too. Boy, boss sure likes to torture us a LOT!"

"No doubt about it. Well, see you tomorrow. Have a safe journey home."

"Okay, you too." She waved happily at her friend. She slowly turned her direction towards home.

_Home. Him. Crap…I hope he's sleeping by now…_

She took slow and small steps, thinking that if she does that she will be able to pass the time. But eventually she reached home. She checked any sign of life in the house.

_No lights on…no moving shadows inside. This means…that he's asleep. Good. _

She took silent steps and took out her key. She inserted the key into the lock and turned the key. The door lock clicked indicating it's opened. She opened the door; it was so dark inside the house. She switched on the lights.

She brushed away some dirt from her coat and tidied her hair. Then she looked up.

She jumped. Almost fell. She placed her hand on her chest, trying to calm down.

_You are SUPPOSE to be SLEEPING NOW! I can't face you right now! _

"Don't sneak up on people like that! You scared me!" She screamed at him. "What are you doing still awake at this hour? You are supposed to-"

"I'M SORRY!"

She was taken aback. "…sleep."

_Whoa. I didn't see that coming. Never expected for him to actually apologize. Besides, he's done nothing wrong. Other than picking up fights with others. Is that what you are apologizing for? _

He was giving her a pleading look. She can't help thinking how cute he is with those puppy eyes. She wanted to just kiss him silly for being so cute, but instead she just stared at him.

_Silly boy. I should be the one apologizing. Not you. But my pride won't let me._

"I'm sorry."

She bit her lower lip. His voice is softer, almost like a whisper but enough for her to listen.

"I really am sorry. I know you're mad about last night. But I just want to tell you, I'm sorry."

She stared again. Her mind is still processing the current event. Realizing that she had been holding her breath, she gave lout a long sigh and took another breath.

"That's all. I'll go sleep now."

He walks away. She opened her mouth. But she didn't know what to say. She unconsciously called out his name.

He stopped in his tracks. He slowly turned to face her.

She concentrated at what she is supposed to be saying. When she finally knew what to say, she looked down before looking at him straight at the face again.

"Promise me this."

_Hopefully, this time…it works…_

She could see he is confused. "I'll forgive you if you promise me this. Just this."

"Okay."

She felt relieved hearing that. _Okay…here it goes…_

"Stop fighting. Don't EVER fight again."

She silently crossed her fingers. Hoping his answer would be yes. _Please…please….say yes._

"Deal." Then he turned away again.

She nodded even when she knew he can't see it. As soon as he closed the door to his room she breathes out, realizing that she had somehow held her breath.

She smiled a little and walked towards her own room. But not before stopping in front of his room. She stood there as if waiting for something. "I'm sorry too, Alex." she whispered to his door before walking away.

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_~ I've learned...that no matter how good a friend is, they're going to hurt you every once in a while and you must forgive them for that._

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(I just have to post this. I have double feelings about posting it though. It was suppose to end up elsewhere, probably in the dumpster? Err, enjoy? Anyway, does anyone have AsuRaku pictures? Especially the one that looked like their wedding and the one with their baby? I accidentally deleted those pictures while cleaning up my hard drive, :( O_0 ...)


	8. Companion Piece Pt 02

_(Companion piece for Chapter 3.) _

Her back was facing him. She just finished making breakfast, and was tiding up the kitchen a little.

"One of my college friends called me yesterday. Apparently a reunion will be held next week. Come to think of it…I haven't seen them for four years. Must be awkward meeting them again…"

She turned to him, waving her hand as she talked. "I was wondering, do you want to go with me?"

He didn't answer, but kept staring at her. She slowly followed his gaze. He was obviously staring at her…chest. She sighed and rolled her eyes, can't help feeling flustered because she still got it and annoyed that she had been talking to the wall moments ago. _Huh…a guy can't help being a guy after all…._

She quickly waved her hand at his face, "Hey! Are you listening?"

"Huh? What?" he blinked, his eyes returned to her face.

Pouting at him she repeated herself and crossed her arms as an attempt to cover her front from his prying eyes, "Do you want to go with me to my college reunion? It's next week."

"Eh? College reunion?" he replied her with another question.

She repeated her question, but this time his reply was…choking himself while eating his breakfast. Worry took over her and she swiftly went to his side, patting his back.

_You are such a cute big baby…_she tried not to titter. "Chew properly before you swallow. You're not a small boy. Seriously, I feel like I am your mother sometimes."

Grabbing a glass nearby, she poured him orange juice and offered the glass to him. He took it, drank it a little too fast, and coughs again. She sighed and patted his back again. After a while, instead of patting she found herself caressing his back gently.

He wore a shirt but she felt as if she was touching his skin underneath the fabric. Instinctively, she imagined touching his back muscles with her hand, imagined how smooth his skin is, imagine how it would feel if her own skin was against his….

Instantly the thought sent a jolt of electricity through her. She quickly withdrew her hand from his back. _It's early in the morning and you're already thinking about __**that**__? Back to the topic! Inviting him to the reunion! _ "So, are you coming or not?"

He smirked, and she knew she's not going to like his answer. "Remind me why I to go with you again? To YOUR college reunion?"

_You are so unbelievable!_ His astonishing sense of humour and reckless attitude has never fail to amaze her. She was gawking as he continued to grin.

"Because I hate the idea of leaving you all alone in this house by yourself. Plus…who knows what you're going to do having the house all for yourself."

He tilted his head, "Right…don't forget, I'm paying the rent too. So I think I have the right to do what I want."

"What did you say?" Her tone is serious as her expression.

"I said I'm not going to your stupid reunion thing."

_You did not just say that._ She won't let this go. "Yes, you are. You are GOING to my stupid reunion thing."

"Well, that's just too bad. I'm not GOING." He replied.

She was taken aback as his head leaned towards her. But immediately she leaned towards him too, "Yes you are!"

"Well, you can't make me go!"

"Oh yes I CAN!"

Gradually, she's aware of the distance of their faces with each other. His emerald eyes gaze deeply into her. Her heart skipped a beat. He didn't leaned back, so she did. Deciding that he was just too stubborn; she couldn't help wondering why she agreed to live with him in the house in the first place.

"Fine. I'll just go ask Dearka then to go with me." She walked to the door, waved her hand at him.

"I'm off to work."

_I really need to make sure he'll go with me to that…stupid reunion… _

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"_Thank you for the offer Lacus, but…unfortunately I have plans for that day. I'm sorry. Why don't you ask him to go with you? He could use the social interactions once in a while, as he seemed to have problems in that area."_

No doubt about that. She knew who Dearka meant. But the only problem is he had refused to go. And she had a hard time trying to change his mind.

But to tell the truth, she had her own reason to make sure he would go to the reunion with her. And she wasn't going to tell anyone about it…especially him. Her insides curled as she thought of the reason. She felt like she was…lying to him. Betraying him. And worst…using him.

And she can't help it doing all that to him.

She came back from work, and found him playing his PS3. She saw on the couch with. He didn't say anything. Her blue eyes are fixed on him, but still he ignored her. He was too busy playing the game to notice her.

_Impressive_…she thought. She watched the screen and watched him play. But before long he had lose to the game. She looked at him again. He looked down, as if something was bothering him. She wondered what it is. She turned to the screen… let out a chuckle…then giggled.

"How could you lose in such an easy game?" She giggled as she looked at him.

The puzzled look was one expression he often gave her when he seemed to be bothered by something. She took the controller from his hands and pressed the continue button. She gave him a smile, and he gave her the 'go ahead' sign. She was determined to show him what she is capable of.

Her eyes are fixed at the screen but out of the corner of her eye, she knew he kept turning his head and stared at her. Her lips curved into another smile, wondering if she should return his gaze at her.

Out of a sudden, she threw her arms up in the air and cheered and giggled more. Satisfied at the fact that she had beaten the game that he had lose. After tossing the controller aside, she leaned her head back and slowly closed her eyes.

"Congratulations. You beat the game." She heard him said and she smiled again.

"Thank you."

There was silence. She wondered if he's still there with her. She waited for any sound of movement. Still there is silence. Afraid that he had left, she quickly opened her eyes.

She noticed that he had also leaned his head, both eyes closed. She bit her lips as she ease herself closer to him. Slowly she leaned her head to him, before whispering in his ears.

"Would you like to go with me to my college reunion?"

He smiled when she asked him. This time, it was her turned to be puzzled. _What's so funny?_

"I thought you were going with that Dearka guy."

Her mind replayed to the moment Dearka had declined her offer.

"Well…he…said he'll think about it. Do you really don't want to go?" She lied. She doesn't want to give him the hint that she was desperate for him to go. But the truth is, she really is desperate for him to go.

"Do you really want me to?"

She eyed his face; there is no amusement in his face. For once, he was not making fun of her. "Yes, I want you to. I feel much more comfortable around you."

"Well, if you really want me to…" he looked at her, and her eyebrows rose in anticipation for his next sentence. And for some reason, she was holding her breath too.

"…I will go with you. Besides, it's not fun being here all by myself."

_You are such a life-saver! _"Thank you so much. I know I can always count on you." She whispered to him again.

She bends her head towards him…and brushed her lips softly against his. After counting one second, she leaned back and kept smiling at him.

_It's just a friendly kiss…he won't think you're leading him on. Come to think of it, I don't really need to kiss him to thank him, right? Hmm, minty taste…_

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_~ Everywhere I want to go, I want to bring you along, because I need you there._

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_(Companion piece for Chapter 4 – Don't make me fall in love with you again.) _

_He finally came, just as she had expected._

Her laughing slowly fades and her smile turns into a frown. Her lips slightly parted and she found herself standing for no apparent reason.

"Lacus." _He_ called her name.

Her heart beats faster at the sound of _his_ voice. "Ki…Kira." _Why am I stuttering? Why am I blushing?_

"Good to see you again." _He_ politely extended _his_ hand.

She glanced at it. Hesitated at first, but she finally shook _his_ hand. "Good to see you, too."

Her knees trembled when _he_ tightened _his_ grip on her hand. She withdrew her hand, blushing more. She assured herself that her reaction was because of her surprise of finally seeing _him_ again, nothing more. But as _his_ dark, amethyst eyes continuously stared at her, she immediately felt a swift, responsive heat flooded through her. She used to love the effect _he_ had on her. Now, she hated _him_ for still having that effect on her.

"I…I didn't knew you were coming." _Liar, you knew he would come._ She forced herself to smile. She looked behind him, "Where's Cagalli?"

"Here I am!" She slightly jumped when an arm hooked her shoulders. "Oh Lacus! I'm so glad you came to this reunion! We missed you sooo much! Especially my brother here. Right, Kira?"

She was stunned by her words. As Cagalli kissed her cheek she turned her head slightly at him, but he was looking at another direction. She followed his attention, he was staring at Kira.

"Wow Lacus…you haven't changed one bit. Or should I say, you are as beautiful as ever." Cagalli said to her, in which she responded with a faint smile.

"Who's this?" Kira asked her. "Boyfriend of yours?"

She shifted her head and narrowed her eyes at him. Kira was jealous; she silently smiled at the fact that she too, still had that effect on him.

"Boyfriend? You have a boyfriend now Lacus?" Cagalli gave her a disapproving look.

She swallowed and threw him a timid glimpse then quickly looked away, wondering what answer she should give. "My…date. He's…my date." _Great cover Lacus, now he'll make fun of it._

"Date?" Kira raised an eyebrow. "You brought a date to our reunion? What do you think this is? A prom?"

She was about to argue back when he suddenly stood up.

"I believe I haven't introduced myself, I'm Alex, Alex Dino. Nice to meet you."

"Alex Dino eh? I'm Kira Yamato. So, how do you like the reunion party so far?"

She nervously looked at him then at Kira then back at him. She noticed he was smiling, something he rarely do although his smile looked rather awkward. _You should smile more. You look better that way._

"Hey, I just remembered! I have been working on this project for a year now and now it's finally finished! And I want to show it to you guys!" She was relief it was Cagalli who finally broke the awkward silence between them.

But when Cagalli leads them towards a particular room, her relief was quickly crushed with panic and fear. She turned to him, only to find him still glaring at…Kira.

_Oh Alex, please save me from this…_

TO BE CONTINUED…

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_(Thank you for reading especially to all the lovely reviews! It keeps this story alive, and not…well, dead. Kudos to all of you.)_

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	9. Companion Piece Pt 03

_(Companion piece for Chapter 4 – cont'd) _

"Come in, come in, the show is about to start," urged Cagalli. "Seize a seat fast, or pick a lap you'll be."

Pick a lap. A term they had used if there are no empty seats left, not to mention it would mean sprawling across each other's laps, with looping arms about each other's shoulders. She stood in dismay looking at the doorway. She was still disappointed and mad at _him_ for declining her offer. She turned her head, realizing there are no available seats left, and only one lap left unoccupied.

And it's none other than Kira. He raised a jovial gaze to her, held up his hand to her in a welcoming gesture.

She swallowed hard against a suddenly dry throat. She looked around frantically. Surely there had to be another chair? Or a stool. Or whatever things that can be sit on as long as it is not HIS lap! But she found nothing, not even a floor space.

"Maybe I should invite Alex again." she suggested. "I brought him here with me, so I don't think it's a good idea if I left him alone outside."

Cagalli scoffed, "Relax Lacus. He won't get kidnapped or anything. Besides, there are plenty of people out there partying. I'm pretty sure he'll survive a few minutes without you. Most of us here don't even know the guy, so basically he's like…an outsider."

She narrowed her eyes with a look of disapproval which Cagalli didn't notice. She sighed and reluctantly turned to Kira, whose gaze lingered on her face. His gaze penetrated hers, as if he knew of her reluctance to sit on his lap.

"Here," he finally said, rising slowly without breaking eye contact. "Take the seat. I'll just sta—"

"No, no, don't be silly!" _What am I doing? Take the chair! Let him stand._ She caught his shoulders and pressed him back down, smiling at him. "That's okay. I don't mind...sitting on your lap." _I can get through this_, she swore to herself.

The light was turned off, and Cagalli's ballad rock music blared from the speakers as colors flashed across the screen.

Kira instinctively shifted his body in the chair, allowing her into a more comfortable position against his chest. She instantly resisted. She didn't want to be comfortable. She remained rigid and tense, not allowing her back to rest against him. _'Just calm down, Lacus'_

The show, she realized, had already begun. She'd somehow missed the opening but smiled as the others gave teasing comments and shared hilarious remarks about every photo displayed.

And then an unexpected photo came, it made her smile wobble and her heart lurch deeply. It was a close-up photo of Kira and her, embracing each other, deeply involved in a kiss. His hand was placed at her back, while the other entangled in her hair. Their eyes closed, their faces flushed with passion, lust…love.

"Whew! Is it me, or is it getting hot in here? Someone get me a bucket of ice!"

Chuckles and groans rose around her, but she sat still in silence, struggling to breath past her thundering heart. The screen had long changed but she could no longer focus. The photo of Kira and her kissing reminded her too vividly of what had gone on between them.

Then she began to feel of Kira's soft breath against her neck. She didn't dare look at him. She couldn't bear it. How could she? She couldn't even sit through anymore photos of them together.

A muffled rose from her throat, and she shifted forward to rise from his lap.

But quickly Kira caught her. He gripped her hip and thigh, her gaze swung to him with surprised wide eyes. The light in the room may be dimmed but she was very aware of his movement, realizing that his attention was directed to her mouth.

"Let me go," she said in a tremulous whisper. She felt very relief when he did immediately.

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She furiously headed out of the room; she needed to get out of there, she needs to find a place where she could be alone. She veered through the first escape she saw—the glass doors that led to the outside the house.

She breathed in deeply the cold night air. It would take her awhile to bring her temperature back into line. She was flushed with heat from embarrassment, and mostly from anger.

It was very humiliating to see how she was so obviously infatuated with a man who never even really cared about her. He had simply taken what she'd been so happy and stupid to give. But still…

_What made him think he even had the right to touch her in any way, let alone to hold her against her will? Why in heaven's name had he even wanted to? Was it to prove to her that he still could? Or to show that he still had the power to corrupt her common sense?_

She heard the quiet opening of the glass door behind her, and bit her lip in dismay. She really did need a few more moments alone to calm herself. She swiftly turned around to reluctantly greet whoever had joined her, immediately her dismay deepened ten times fold.

"Lacus, I'm sorry," he expressed his regret. "I was out of line when I tried to stop you from leaving. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Forget it, Kira" She lifted a negligent shoulder. "It's no big deal." She gave him a meaningful stare, "Just don't let it happen again."

He held her stare, looking rather surprised. "Don't let _what_ happen again?"

"Don't…" She swallowed hard. _Don't touch me, or hold me, or make my heart pound._ "…manhandle me."

He narrowed his eyes and gave her a small grin, "You've changed a lot, Lacus."

"I'm glad you've noticed."

Kira turned away and sighed, then looked back at her, "I guess I just wanted to have the chance to talk to you before you… you know, rushed off somewhere."

She raised an eyebrow. He'd changed too. "What did you want to talk to me about?"

"I assume you must be very embarrassed by the photos," his tone business-like.

She stiffened, unsure of how to respond. "Embarrassed? _Why_ should I be embarrassed?"

"Let's see, maybe because we made damn fools of ourselves every chance we got?" he casually replied her.

"Oh. _That_."

"Yes, _that_." He sighed again, "I suppose I pretty much behaved like a sex-crazed idiot back then, didn't I?"

For some unknown reason, she was beginning to feel vindicated, "You suppose correctly."

"And I…took full advantage of your…innocence."

His words especially his voice caused her chest to throb painfully. "If you hadn't someone else would have, I'm sure."

Kira's scrutinizing eyes shifted to search her face. A frown filled his face as he nodded, "Then I owe you another apology. I shouldn't have said those things to you when I left. You didn't deserve any of it. I'm sorry."

She gaped at him. She had never expected this, not in this lifetime. An actual apology from the infamous Kira Yamato. She struggled to find her voice. "No, don't be sorry. You only told me the truth. If it was harsh, well…" she shrugged, realizing as she spoke that she believed what she was saying "…at least you forced me to face the facts."

Which had also been the hardest thing she had ever done. Memories from that fateful incident rose in her mind…

"_Love?" he'd scoffed as he'd packed his bags. "I don't love you, Lacus. I never did. I just want you._ _There's a big difference. And this is the only 'real' thing we've ever had between us." And he placed her hand forcefully on his crotch._

Grappling to hide the pain that memory still inflicted, she went on in a soft, soothing tone, "In fact, I believe I owe you my thanks. You had taught me a very valuable lesson."

"I was a son of a bitch and you know it, Lacus. I wouldn't blame you if you never—"

"No," she shook her head. "I mean it, Kira. You really did teach me a lesson, an important too. Do you remember how dead set I was on telling my dad to go to hell when he insisted that I break up with you?"

Kira fell silent and slowly nodded.

"I was ready to give up all his financial support and pay my own way, even if it meant dropping out of college. How could I have been so crazy? I was willing to throw my future away, and for what? A silly thing called love!"

She mimicked the exact tone he'd used with her, all those years ago. "I know better now, of course. Thank you for your honesty. You could have told me some pretty lie but instead, make me face reality, and I learned from my mistakes."

He remained silent, his amethyst eyes never leaving her.

She gazed deeply into his eyes. "So I do thank you. You didn't hurt me in any lasting way. You actually helped me." Although she meant every word, these last few stuck in her throat, but she knew she had to force them out. "And time did prove you right. There wasn't anything between us except…sex."

Something flashed within his eyes, but quickly faded away. His lips thinned. His jaw squared. His voice was dangerously soft when he spoke, "So…does that mean that you forgive me?"

"Yes, I forgive you," she said firmly.

They stared at each other for what seem like an eternity.

Then he placed his arms around her and pulled her slowly into a hug. "Thank you, Lacus Clyne," Kira breathed into her hair, "for your forgiveness."

"And thank you, Kira Yamato, for your apology," she replied in a breathless whisper against his shoulder.

"You're shivering."

"We should go inside."

He drew back just far enough to peer down at her. "I think I have a better way to stay warm." Slowly he lowered his head, closed his eyes and took her mouth in a deep, moving kiss.

Her eyes went wide in a dazed astonishment that he would do such a thing. That she would even let him. Desire immediately flared in her. She eventually gave herself over to it, wanting the kiss to last forever.

Out of nowhere, a sound of crashing glass came. And quickly her sanity came back with dizzying speed.

_What am I doing? What am I thinking kissing him back? Have I completely lost my mind? Yes, I have!_

With a moan of dismay, she pulled free of his kiss. "Why did you do that?" she whispered frantically between breaths.

His breathing pattern matches hers. "For the same reason you didn't stop me." His voice was low and hoarse in lust.

He narrowed his eyes at her, "Tell me, Lacus, _why didn't you stop me_?"

She backed away from him, "Curiosity. Just…curiosity." As soon as she was sure she was at a safe distance away from him, she stood straight and stared at him, "And I assure you, it's been satisfied," she quickly move to pass him.

But he quickly caught her wrist and spun her around facing him; he smirked and began lowering his lips towards hers again. "I don't believe curiosity had much to do with it. And don't even tell me you're satisfied. I know you, Lacus. And I think you know you want more too. I can feel it when I kiss you."

She gulped and held her breath; her eyes unable to focus on anything except his lips. Forcing her vision back onto his face, she noticed that he seemed to be staring at something behind her. She followed his gaze and saw that the glass door is broken. And blood was dripping from the shattered glass.

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_~ I may forget what you said, but I'll never forget how you made me feel._

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(Whew, finally, the awaited chapter! I present to you some little insight on Lacus and Kira's history together. My head can't stop re-playing the song White Flag by Dido, I think it fits perfectly for Kira in this. Do check the poll on my profile, and place your votes. I 'might' continue it, once I get the green light from the author and after I complete this fic. There's a lot I want to say, but I guess I better keep it to myself. So for now, enjoy reading this.)


	10. Interlude Black Heart Memories

_(Interlude – Black Heart Memories)_

He should have known better than to expect that she'll be coming for the reunion…especially after what had happened between them the last time. He still thinks of her every now and then. Every single day, she constantly appears in the back of his mind. How is she? Is she well? Does she hate him? What she's been up to these years? Does she still love him? Does she think about him too? Then came the questions that drove him so agonizingly close to insanity, has she moved on? Did she found someone else? Is she married now? Does she have kids? Who is the fucking moron that is screwing her now?

Tension gripped him as he scanned those faces, searching for one in particular that had always been in his heart but is currently not among the crowd.

Lacus Clyne.

She wasn't there. Or at least not yet, which he hoped was the case.

"Kira Yamato, you old dog!" came a voice that startled Kira from his thoughts. It was Sai Argyle, his partner in crime during their college days. "It's wonderful to see that you are still alive! What were you thinking, staying out of touch with us for four years? I don't care how rich and successful you are now. I ought to kick your butt."

"Yeah, you promised me that years ago," Kira replied, still somewhat tense from the surprise, "and I haven't seen any action yet." He gave Sai his famous grin.

Sai laughed, "You dog, your comebacks are impeccable as always. Congratulations, man. Heard you sold your latest security software for big bucks. I could already see the headlines saying, 'Kira Yamato, the most eligible millionaire of the year."

"Well, well, well…look who decided to finally show up at this crappy reunion. Don't you have some dinner event you need to get to?" cut in Fllay Allster, looking and sounding exactly like the sassy cheerleader she'd been in college. She gave him her usual charming smile before pulling him into a tight hug, "I've missed you so much, Kira. Where have you been?"

When she pulled away, he noticed that she wore a sizable diamond on her left hand. Fllay waved her left hand in front of his face when she noticed his frown, "Too late, tiger. I'll be walking down the aisle in three months."

"Well Fllay, what can I say? You are the one that got away." His smile faltered a bit when a thought occurred to him, what if Lacus is…married too?

After chatting with his friends for a while, he looked around again. Half expecting to meet the gaze of the crystal blue-eyed cherry blossom-haired goddess he greatly missed and hadn't seen for four years.

"She's not here yet, Kira," his sister's voice came out of nowhere. He felt a hand on his shoulder, "She should be soon, though."

He didn't pretend not to know whom she meant. Gritting his teeth, he silently fought the sudden temptation to strangle her. It couldn't be helped though; this is his twin sister, Cagalli. It goes without saying that they could read each other's thought or something.

Kira had rented Cagalli a house in Heliopolis and lived there with her and several friends for a while, but he'd never really felt a part of the group. Although Cagalli and he are twins, he'd always felt decades older, working to pay the bills and Cagalli's tuition while the others attended classes, parties and ball games. He'd actually seen very little of his housemates.

Well, except for Lacus.

Lacus. Guilt and regret jabbed deep into his gut.

Cagalli pursed her lips and shook her head, "I never thought you'd come to the reunion this year. Seriously, I'm worried about you, Kira. You've been too caught up in business that you've forgotten that there's more to life. I'm more likely to see you on the news or on some society page than I am in person."

"That's crazy." He told her.

"Oh, yeah?" Cagalli lodged a hand on one hip. "You're always with the 'power players' now, you've lost touch with the people who really care about you."

"Like who?"

"Me, for instant. When was the last time we saw each other?"

"Just a few weeks ago."

"Weeks, Kira? Seriously? Try a FULL YEAR. You can barely squeeze me into your schedule, you're so wrapped up in your financial ventures and schmoozing with high society. Sometimes I wonder if you really care about me at all," She shook her head again, looking bewildered. "How can you be happy spending so much time with the same kind of people who put us down our whole lives? Don't you remember what they did to dad, and mum, and … and us?"

"I haven't forgotten a damn thing." A surge of dark emotion accompanied his words. He would never forget. And that was why he intended to climb to the very top of the power chain. Nobody he cared about would ever again suffer the fear and degradation that had beaten down his immigrant parents and riddled his and Cagalli's childhood.

A weary sigh escaped Cagalli. "There's more to life than acquiring power, Kira. There's friendship. Family. Love. I know you believe in all that, or you wouldn't have bought me a new house on ORB. All I'm asking is that you start using that heart of yours a little more—and I meant really using it—before it withers away."

Kira couldn't resist teasing her. "Oh? What, now you want a new car too?"

She punched him in the shoulder. "I'm serious, Kira! I pray every night that you'll fall in love with some nice woman and marry her and start a family of your own."

"A…family of my own?" Images of 'family' flashed through his mind—his father working himself to death to keep them sheltered and fed, until one day he was accidentally killed because of a riot at the factory he was working. His mother merely died of a high fever as their family couldn't afford to go to a doctor or to get some medicines. Cagalli was just a nine-year-old kid, hungry and cold, depending on Kira for her very existence.

Start a family of his own? He might as well cut open his heart and let it bleed to death. "Don't waste your prayers, Cagalli," he murmured. "You're all the family I need."

Cagalli gave her twin brother a wistful and sad smile. "I know. But you also need friends, Kira. Real friends. Everyone from that rented house in Heliopolis cared about you long before you made your millions."

"I barely knew any of them."

"Of course you knew them!" Cagalli retorted. "In fact, for a while there, I thought that you and Lacus might—"

"I barely knew Lacus, either," Kira interjected her coolly.

It was the truth. Despite all the time she'd spent in his bed—stolen hours between her classes and his two jobs—he hadn't really known her. He hadn't known her favourite food, music or colours. He hadn't even known her hobbies, interests or views on life. He wasn't even sure if he'd known what courses she took. And he hadn't given any of those things a thought…until he'd left her far behind him. Kira swallowed a lump in his throat. He wasn't even sure if he really knew her at all.

He snickered inside; he and Lacus hadn't wasted much time on talking. Hadn't gone anywhere or done anything that didn't involve sex. They'd had done plenty of that. He hadn't been able to keep his hands off her. And she hadn't ever been able to say no. At least, not to him.

She'd been a virgin the first time he'd made love to her. Love…

A deep, sharp pang assailed him again, and he quickly walked away from Cagalli in search of a drink. A strong one.

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While he tried to at least enjoy the glass of champagne in his hand, out the corner of his eye, he detected a group move en masse towards the entrance. When a faint soft purely feminine voice reached his ears, Kira was immediately embraced with nostalgic force, causing his tension to grow. Her voice hadn't changed. In the days gone by, the mere murmur of it had filled him with a keen, sensual anticipation. He had responded every single time, regardless of where he was or whom he was with.

And through it all, Kira hadn't even caught a clear view of Lacus yet. The others clustered around her blocked her from his sight. The tension within him gradually rose to the level of frustration. He wanted to see her RIGHT NOW.

As if responding to his unvoiced impatience, the crowd slowly drifted off leaving Lacus standing alone at the middle…with a guy. And the guy is currently gazing at her like a love-struck fool.

She always had that effect on most men. She'd glowed with the kind of striking beauty that turned all gazes her way. Waist-length hair; a slender but voluptuous body; endless legs; smooth pale skin that would seem to bruise easily if touched. She'd been too damn beautiful to be real. But she had been real. She has always been real to him.

And so kind-hearted. And so…vulnerable too. He never should have let her move into the house in Heliopolis.

He struggled to keep his emotions under control. It would look very bad for him to go straight up to her, demanding her to tell him who was the guy she came with. But as soon as he takes another good look at her, desire ignited again in his core.

Her hair was a darker shade of cherry blossom now— cascading in thick, shiny waves to her waist, giving her a more seductive, elegant and mysterious look. She'd lost weight but he could still picture the voluptuous curves he remembered so well, even if he couldn't see much of them beneath her beautiful dress. Her heart-shaped face also looked slimmer, but with every graceful curve and hollow more pronounced. She wore no makeup, as far as he could tell. But that only made her look lovelier to him.

A major change, he thought. She'd always been glamour incarnate—wine-coloured lip-gloss; exotic, kohl-lined eyes. But right now, she looked very simple, a slim, attractive woman in her early twenties. Certainly no femme fatale. No living, breathing fantasy. The difference went deeper than her appearance, though. He wasn't sure how he knew, but he did. Something inside her had changed. Gone was the tangible sexuality that had glowed from her like a force field.

He stared at Lacus in both utter disappointment and acute relief. He kept his eyes on her as she invited the guy to sit with her. He dimly smiled as he saw her head tilted back as she laughed. The sound so beautiful, he had wanted to hear it again and again.

He poured more champagne into his glass. She most probably wouldn't want to see him any more than he wanted to see her. The memories between them were not all pleasant.

He decided to drink another glass of drink.

The sight of her still sends him reeling even after four years never seeing each other. No other woman's beauty had ever affected him quite the way as Lacus had. Four years apart would have brought about a lot of changes in her he was sure. After a fortifying swallow of champagne, he slowly ventured towards her.

She looked around the crowd, but did a startled double at him as soon as she spotted him walking toward her direction. Her conversations broke off. Her sensual lips slowly parted.

His eyes fixed on her lips. Gosh, how much he'd love kissing those lips of hers again. Never before had another a woman enslaved him so completely with just a simple kiss. He had never wanted anyone as badly as he'd wanted Lacus Clyne. Every day, every night; they'd made love whenever they'd found the chance. Until then, he still hadn't been able to get enough of her. It's a dangerous thing, that kind of sexual obsession.

He'd been so helplessly obsessed with Lacus. He knew that now. Cagalli and the others had always had the impression that Lacus was the one who couldn't keep herself away from him. But in reality, it was him that couldn't keep himself away from her.

Lacus didn't know, of course, the massive amount of effort it had cost him to breakaway from her. Even now, four years later, the mere simple thought about her would somehow always runs through his mind whenever he became aroused. What a damn nuisance at times.

Her gaze locked with Kira's as he approached her.

Everyone around them glanced their way, and a peculiar tension seemed to fill the room. He suddenly felt like the big, bad wolf, poised to pounce on his prey.

She looked soft, feminine and vulnerable. He wanted to take her into his arms right there and then. Kira couldn't quite summon a smile, but he managed a nod. "Lacus."

A faint flush rose in her cheeks. "Ki…Kira."

"Good to see you again." He politely extended his hand, more out of habit than anything.

She glanced at it. After a tense pause, she slowly extended hers. "Good to see you, too."

He shook her hand but her hesitation had thrown him completely. Logically, he understood why she might hold a grudge and hesitate to acknowledge him. Logically, he knew he deserved it. On some other level, though, he reeled from the blow. She had never resisted touching him before. Physical contact between them had always been as easy as the air they'd breathed.

His sense of loss stunned him. How could he feel a loss now when he hadn't seen her in four years? Hadn't even touched her in all that time. Or held her…not even once.

The feel of her hand clasped in his helped Kira regain his equilibrium. She had, after all, only hesitated to shake his hand. She hadn't refused. Her palm settled against his in a warm, cozy fit. Her skin felt pleasingly soft and petal-smooth; her grip firm and responsive.

The contrasts had always stirred him, he remembered: her soft femininity, her surprising strength. Her occasional shyness…her inclination for sensual indulgence. Slow, savouring indulgence, at that…

Memories swamped him, and he involuntarily tightened his grip. He would start right at her tender nape, he would press his mouth there—swirl his tongue just beneath her hairline, then slowly around to her ear, until a groan of approval and pleasure escape her throat … and her back arched … and her hips moved against him…

Her hand still clasped with his, and he could feel her pulse accelerate to a strong, vibrant rhythm. Ah, how could he forget? He remembered that rhythm. His body remembered.

But Kira could see the increasing uneasiness displayed in Lacus's eyes.

He couldn't help a small, rueful smile. Lacus had definitely changed … and in a profoundly disturbing way.

He wondered how deep that change went. He wondered what a man would have to do to find out.

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_~ I wish that I could hold you now... I wish that I could touch you now... I wish that I could talk to you... be with you somehow._

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A/N : First of all, I'd like to thank IgNighted for beta-reading this. The title for this was also his/her idea. You did a great job! With his/her support, I was able to post this. (^_^) (I'm just too lazy to check for grammar errors…)

However, after re-reading the whole thing all over again I eventually come to a conclusion….this interlude piece reminds me of Edward & Bella. It's too sappy and cliché, but it had to be done. I dislike Twilight, it's total BS. On the bright side, this interlude also made me want to write a new Athrun/Lacus fic. A fantasy/medieval kind. I think I watch too much of Game of Thrones and LOTR. Plus, I'm still waiting for the Black Rose to update her fic By Candlelight….

Where have all the AxL writers gone….?

Anyway, enjoy this interlude fic.


	11. Preview Chapter 7

**Just a quick note ~ **

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Well, hello there. Um…hello? *echo….*

Geez, everyone left already?

Cappuri here. Alive and kicking.

First thing first, I am so sorry for not updating this story for ages. I really am. I also apologize if I let any of you down. It was never my intention to do so. So sue me.

Wait, don't. Don't sue me, please.

I am as guilty as charge for not updating sooner and a little hypocrite as well. When I first started writing fanfic stories, I vowed myself to finish it till the end and not leave it halfway. Guess that did not turn out so well. Sorry again.

I must admit that this story has always been in my mind from time to time. I would prefer to update the story on a strict schedule, but my muse kept disappearing on me. Good news is my muse is back. _(I put her in a cage in the basement so that she won't be able get away.) _

Also, I have been re-reading all the reviews I get from you readers. To be honest, those reviews are the ones that really gave me the encouragement and 'push' that I needed to write the new chapter. Every review (be it constructive, destructive, good, bad) that I get from you readers is something I hold very dear and cherish in my heart.

_(Many thanks deep from my heart to all the readers that dropped a review for this story, especially these awesome reviewers __**~Blissfully Disturbed**__ and __**~ IgNighted**__. Thank you so much for giving a review for each chapter. I cherish every single one of your reviews and also all the other reviews from everyone. Once again, I thank you all.)_

It means so much to me that people actually do read the stories I wrote and cared enough to drop a review/comment. So kudos to all you readers! Give yourself a big hand a good pat on the back but careful not to break your spine though.

Just kidding.

So….yeah. There you go.

I know some of you would think I posted a new chapter but sorry to disappoint you, this is just a quick note from me.

However…

A new chapter is coming soon. I hope whoever even reads this looks forward to it.

_Here's a little preview, enjoy._

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The dark figure proved to be quite strong as he had to pull and straddled the intruder down onto the floor. But still the intruder continues to writhe and grumbled under him, desperately trying to get free. He grabbed onto the figure and felt something soft…and squishy.

Then he tentatively squeezed again.

This time a shocked yelp comes from the intruder.

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So there you go, a sneak peek.

It's not much but I hope it would keep you readers excited for the next chapter for the moment.

Last but not least, did any of you miss me?

_Hugs and kisses ~ Cappuri_


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